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Speak for Yourself

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If you don’t live someone’s life or heck, even bother to speak to them, you probably shouldn’t write ignorant and racist articles about said person.

(Here’s a spot on response to that article.)

I’m just sayin’…

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How to make a Cthulhu Pie

Cooking is an art… but baking is a science, so if you can use a measure cup, you can bake! Hooray!

My friends have requested this one several times. Here’s how to bake a Cthulhuberry pie. You can use any kind of berries that you’d like, I choose blueberry for this one.

1. Preheat oven to 425 degrees F (220 degrees C).

2. Mix in large bowl:

4 cups fresh blueberries
3/4 cup sugar
3 tablespoons cornstarch
1/4 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon

You can make your own crust, or you can go the easy route and buy 2 ready made pie crusts at the supermarket, usually near the butter and yogurt.  Line your pie dish with one pie crust. Save 2 berries from the berry mixture to be Cthulhu’s eyes.  Pour the rest of the berry mixture into the crust, and dot with butter.  There will be a lot of excess sugar mixture left in the bowl. Sprinkle some of the mixture into the pie depending on how sweet you like it.  I find about half the mixture gets a good review from tasters, but isn’t too sweet.

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3. You could make a traditional lattice crust at this point, but we’re going to top this pie with Cthulhu.  For extra authenticity, unroll the second crust, dot it with green food dye and reroll it by hand until the food dye is evenly spread.  Then roll it flat again and with a knife, cut our your Cthulhu face and tentacles.  Use a straw to mark the tentacles with suckers! Lay tentacles across the pie, and top with face.  Place reserve berries on face for eyes and, if you have a little extra dough (I usually do) use it to make the eyebrows and hold the berries in place. Remember to cut away excess crust from the edge of the pie and I highly recommend covering the edges with foil before you put the pie in the oven .

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4. Bake pie on lower shelf of oven for about 50 minutes.  Let cool for 2 hours.  Serve with your favorite whipped topping.

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I’m just sayin’… that’s how you make Cthulhu Pie.